Coping with Perinatal Loss: Healing Through Compassion and Balance

Understanding the emotional impact, common symptoms, and when to seek support.

Disclaimer: This article is for informational and educational purposes only. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Please consult a licensed healthcare professional for individualized support.

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Perinatal loss — including miscarriage, stillbirth, pregnancy complications, infant loss, or loss in the neonatal period — is one of the most heartbreaking experiences a person or family can go through. It affects the mind, body, and spirit.

Even though perinatal loss is common, it is not commonly talked about. Many individuals suffer in silence, feeling isolated, misunderstood, or unsure whether their emotional experience is “normal.” Recent research shows that perinatal loss is strongly associated with elevated levels of grief, depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress symptoms, emphasizing the importance of compassionate mental health support following loss (Herbert et al., 2022).

This article explores the feelings associated with perinatal loss, common mental health responses, and signs that it may be time to seek emotional support.

You are not alone — and your grief is valid.

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Emotional Responses After Perinatal Loss

Perinatal loss can trigger a broad range of emotions. None of these feelings are “wrong” or “too much.” They are human.

Common emotional responses include:

• Deep sadness or grief

A powerful, overwhelming sense of loss.

• Shock or disbelief

Many people feel numb or unable to accept what has happened.

• Guilt or self-blame

Even when nothing could have been prevented, individuals may tell themselves they “should have done something differently.”

• Anger

At circumstances, medical situations, one’s body, or the unfairness of the loss.

• Anxiety

Fear about the future, fears related to pregnancy, or generalized worry.

• Loneliness

Feeling disconnected from others, even loved ones.

• Emotional numbness

Some individuals shut down emotionally as a protective response.

• Jealousy or pain around others who are pregnant

A completely normal but often unspoken emotional reaction.

• Changes in identity

Especially for those who became attached to the role of parenthood.

Grief is not linear — strong emotions can come in waves, even months later.

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Is Depression Common After Perinatal Loss?

Yes, depression is very common after perinatal loss, both short-term and long-term.

Grief and depression can overlap.

However, depression may be present when someone experiences:

• Persistent low mood

• Loss of interest in daily activities

• Difficulty functioning

• Feelings of worthlessness

• Changes in sleep or appetite

• Emotional numbness

• Ongoing sadness that does not improve over time

Depression is not a sign of weakness. It is a natural response to a deeply painful experience.

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Other Mental Health Conditions That May Appear After Perinatal Loss

Perinatal loss can affect mental health in multiple ways. Individuals may develop:

1. Anxiety Disorders

• Worry about the future

• Health fears

• Panic attacks

• Anxiety about future pregnancies

2. Postpartum Depression (even without a living infant)

Hormonal shifts combined with grief can trigger symptoms.

3. PTSD or Trauma Responses

Especially if the loss involved:

• Medical emergencies

• Unexpected outcomes

• Physical pain

• ICU/NICU stays

• Feelings of fear or helplessness

Flashbacks, nightmares, intrusive memories, and avoidance may occur.

4. Complicated Grief

Grief that remains intense, overwhelming, or significantly interferes with daily life.

5. Relationship strain

Partners may grieve differently and misunderstand each other’s emotional needs.

These responses are not failures of coping — they are reflections of an emotionally devastating experience.

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How Do I Know When It’s Time to Seek Help?

People often wait too long to reach out, unsure whether their feelings are “normal.”

There is no wrong time to seek support, but it may be especially helpful if you notice:

✔ Your sadness feels overwhelming or does not improve

If daily life feels heavy or unmanageable for weeks or months.

✔ You withdraw from others

Avoiding conversations, social situations, or support systems.

✔ You feel stuck, unable to move forward in grieving

Not meaning “forgetting” — but feeling immobilized emotionally.

✔ You have trouble sleeping, eating, or functioning

Perinatal loss can disrupt daily routines.

✔ You experience intrusive memories, nightmares, or trauma symptoms

These may indicate trauma responses.

✔ You blame yourself or feel intense guilt

Even when you rationally know you did nothing wrong.

✔ You have anxiety about future pregnancies or medical experiences

✔ Your grief is causing tension in your relationships

✔ You have thoughts of self-harm

If you’re in immediate danger, call 911 or text 988 for crisis support.

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Why Support Makes a Difference

Talking with a supportive mental health professional can give you:

• A safe place to share your story

• Space to honor your loss

• Tools to navigate complex emotions

• Validation that what you’re feeling is real and understandable

• Help distinguishing grief from depression or trauma

• Guidance at a pace that feels right for you

You do not need to navigate perinatal loss alone.

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A Compassionate Space at Nurtured Balance Wellness

At Nurtured Balance Wellness, PLLC, many individuals reach out after a perinatal loss because they want:

• A calm, supportive environment

• Someone who truly listens

• A provider who understands emotional health during and after pregnancy

• Space to process grief without judgment

• Clarification about what they’re feeling

• Help exploring next steps when they feel ready

This article cannot diagnose or offer treatment, but it can remind you:

Your grief is real. Your pain matters. And support is available.

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If you or a family member is struggling after a perinatal loss, Nurtured Balance Wellness is here to provide a compassionate, understanding space — whenever you're ready.

Reference

Herbert, A., Hodgkinson, E. L., & Crawford, J. R. (2022). The mental health impact of perinatal loss: A systematic review and meta-analysis. BMC Pregnancy and Childbirth, 22, Article 492. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12884-022-04898-2